Sue Scheff Blog

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Sue Scheff: Michael Fertik – ReputationDefender CEO – Specializes in Online Defamation

abcnewsShortcomings in the Law Allow Cyberdefamation Campaigns, Legal Expert Says 

Read entire article here: http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/AheadoftheCurve/Story?id=6960397&page=1

The Law as an Accomplice

Legal experts, however, emphasized that the law protects Web sites like Topix. Even if the comments are considered defamatory by a court of law, Topix has no legal obligation to take the content down.

Defenders of the legal landscape argue that a change could stifle open discussion and free speech. But others maintain that in stories like this, regardless of who emerges, once the veil of anonymity is lifted, it is the law itself that is a co-conspirator.

“The law as it currently stands is an accomplice because it creates no incentive whatsoever for Web sites to review or police themselves from content that is potentially devastating to real people and real lives,” Michael Fertik, a lawyer who specializes in online defamation, told ABCNews.com.

Part of the problem, Fertik continued, is that laws that made sense at the birth of the Internet age have not matured. It takes years to redress online defamation problems under the present regime. But, in the meantime, libelous comments easily found through search engines can sideline both personal and professional lives.

Although privacy and free speech advocates worry that changes to the law could “chill” online speech, Fertik argued that “the law can easily catch up without destroying speech.”

But until then?

“The law provides the red dye for the scarlet letter,” Fertik said. “It provides the ink for the tattoo that people create on Web sites like this.”

http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/AheadoftheCurve/Story?id=6960397&page=1

February 28, 2009 Posted by suescheff | Cyber Defamation, Cyber Slander, Internet Abuse, Internet Defamation, Internet Law, Internet Slander, Michael Fertik, Online Defamation, Sue Scheff | , , , , , , , , | No Comments Yet

Sue Scheff: Teenage Acne and Teen Self Esteem

Johanna Curtis is a licensed skin care professional and has written articles on how teen acne can affect a teens self esteem and more importantly how she can help.  Visit www.teenage-acne.net for more great informational articles, Blogs, and her suggestions to help you help your teen look and feel their best.  Building self esteem can help your teen make better choices.

Source: Johanna Curtis

95% of teenagers in American suffer from acne. The effects of this common problem can be truly devastating. It isn’t just the scars that are left by a bad case of teenage acne; there are many emotional effects as well. Some of which can follow you for life!

Whether it’s right or wrong, we teach our children that the way we look matters. With this societal dogma come many issues when, as a teen, you cannot look your best. With the blemishes that come with acne, many teens experience self esteem issues. These issues may range from being mildly self-conscious to a complete withdrawal from the world. There are actually many emotional issues that come from our need to look our best combined with a case of acne.

Some of the more common issues that result from teenage acne include:

  • Reduced Self-Confidence
  • Social Dysfunction
  • Frustration
  • Poor Self Image
  • Embarrassment
  • Clinical Depression
  • Problems with Anxiety
  • Facial Scaring

The reality of it is that even a mild case of acne can greatly affect the way you live. A few simple blemishes can leave you feeling completely self conscious. For those with more severe cases, they often face ridicule which leads to shame and embarrassment.

With all of this it brings us to the main question: What can be done for teenage acne? Luckily there is an answer. A teenage acne solution that will work where other teen acne medications have failed! Before we talk about the real solution, let’s talk about traditional acne treatments. Likely you have tried some of these products, and it’s very likely you found that they simply didn’t perform to your expectations.

February 23, 2009 Posted by suescheff | Parent's Universal Resource Experts, Parenting Articles, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Teens, Sue Scheff, parent advocate | , , , , , | No Comments Yet

Sue Scheff: Parent Help

ihelpAfter speaking with a mother yesterday in Northern Florida, she introduced me to another valuable website of information for other parents.  Parents’ Universal Resource Experts  is based on parents helping parents and this is another example of it. 

Source: www.ihelpparents.com

What you as a parent will need to change unwanted child behavior?

1.  A commitment We can’t keep you from giving up on your child. Only you can stay committed to parenting.

2.  A plan Without a plan you will not succeed.

3. Support:  Without someone to stand with you, to encourage you and to guide you, you will fail.  Changing unwanted, defiant child behavior is just too difficult to go it alone.

If you have these three necessary requirements, we are ready to help you. We can show you what to do and how to do it, but we can’t do it for you.  That’s the parent’s job.  We have lots of success in helping parents change unwanted child behavior from 7 to 17. 

We can help every parent develop a plan.  The parenting plan we facilitate is the nation’s best parenting program.   It’s call the Parent Project, www.parentproject.com, and they are already in 32 states.  This program has been around for 20 years.  It’s not on trial.  Whether this parenting plan works is totally based on your ability to execute the Parent Project parenting plan.

Learn more here.

February 19, 2009 Posted by suescheff | At Risk Teens, Mom Blogs, Parent's Universal Resource Experts, Parenting Articles, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Teens, Sue Scheff, parent advocate, peer pressure, teen help | , , , , , | No Comments Yet

Sue Scheff: Parents, Friends, Teens and Facebook

facebookToday more and more teens are joining Facebook as well as the other Social Network – however Facebook seems to be growing.  Why?  I honestly don’t know, but I do know parents are enjoying Facebook as much as many kids are.  Recently I stumbled over an article on Tangerine Times  written by a parent helping us navigate our way through the Social Cyberspace.  This topic is critical – as keeping your child’s privacy is important for many reasons.  Help your kids stay safe with Social Networking - read this valuable article.

Source: Tangerine Times

How to Help Your Teen Use Privacy Settings on Facebook

Many parents  tell me they are frustrated with their teens’ use of Facebook. Here are some of the comments I hear frequently from parents:

“They know more than I do about how to use it and set it up, so how can I control it?”

“My kids are using it when I am not around, so how can I possibly know what they are doing, who  they are talking to and if they are being safe with their information?”

“I feel this has gotten out of control, and I don’t really know what to do to get it back under control”

“I am afraid there are predators.”

“I give up.  I just hope they aren’t doing anything stupid because I haven’t a clue what they are doing online.”

What I see are parents who over control (they deny their kids  use of Facebook  entirely) or parents who are completely “hands off”.  And some of these are  parents who normally wouldn’t dream of sending their child into an unknown situation without a little research.  Crazy huh?  I’ve decided to begin a campaign to de-mystify Facebook for those parents who feel they are not comfortable enough to set boundaries for their teens.  It’s not rocket science but I completely understand their frustration in trying to understand it all.

Here are some tips about privacy settings on Facebook.  It is never too late to ask your teenager about their privacy settings, even if they have had their account for years.

Friend Lists

(this is configured by visiting the “Friends area” of Facebook)

  • you can set up different friend lists based on interests; in the case of teens, maybe they shouldn’t have their friends from their high school  in the same friends list with the kids they went to summer camp with 5 years ago  OR if they “friend” someone outside of their school.  Remember:
  • you can add each friend to more than one friend group
  • “Friend Lists” can have specific privacy policies applied to them (this is critical if your child is having a “problem” with one friend but doesn’t want to “un-friend them”

Watch out for Friends’ News Feeds

Most teens use the relationship box but it can be hazardous.  A news feed goes out (to all their “friends”)  as soon as they change their relationship status.  Some teenagers even find out they are bringing “broken up with” because they get a news feed their boyfriend/girlfriend is now “single”.  ouch.  IF your and your teen decide to keep this particular information private, all they have to do is uncheck the box next to “Remove Relationship Status in the “News Feed and Wall Privacy” page.

Those Goofy Applications

Facebook is known for their fun quizzes and applications.  Right now, the hottest app is the “25 Random Things About Me”.  People love taking these little quizzes and passing them along to their “friends”.  But, keep in mind there are some applications that have an age requirement/limit to them and by simply participating, your teen is sending out a signal that they are over 18 (for instance).  Also, applications send out their own news feed.  For instance, “Sarah just took the Sexual Compatibility Test!”  gets sent to  your “friends” after you’ve taken one of the little “quizzes.”  Many publish these without you knowing it.  There are two suggestions you can give your teen;  don’t visit the applications often (and be careful which ones you do) and review your profile after you’ve participated in a new quiz or fun “something”.

Walling

Your teen can customize their wall postings’ visibility.  They can also control which friends can post on their wall.  Here are the two places do that:

  • Go to “Profile page”
  • Click on the “Settings” icon on the wall
  • Find the box that says, “Who can see this?” and select who you want to view the wall posts

Another way is….

  • to control which friends can post on your  teen’s wall  (this is particularly useful if someone is getting a little “nasty” and starting a words war)
  • visit “Profile Privacy Settings”page
  • go to the section labeled “Wall Posts”
  • your teen can disable a specific friends ability to post on their wall and you can select specific friends who can post on their wall.

 

Remove them from Facebook Search Results

By default, Facebook makes your teens’ presence visible to the network they are in.  For instance, in my area, the default group is the SF network.  Most teenagers belong to at least their school’s network which (I believe) is the most important group for a teen to belong to.  It is their primary means of sharing with each other, debrief the day and communicate about upcoming events.  Obviously, there are many other “networks” and groups to belong to.  It should be up to you and your child how many and which ones to belong to.  As you add groups, the exposure is widened.  For good or ill.

  • Visit “search privacy settings” page
  • Under “Search Visibility” select “Only Friends” (doing so, will remove your teen from Facebook search results, so make sure they (you) want them removed totally.
  • Otherwise….you can select another group, such as “My Network and Friends” which (I think) is the default
  • Click “Save Changes”

Remove them from Google Search

Did you know that Facebook gets lots of traffic from displaying user profiles in search engines.  It benefits Facebook.  Not necessarily a teenager.  Not all of  one’s  profile is displayed.  Currently the information displayed is limited to:

  • the profile picture
  • your friends list
  • a link to add as a friend
  • a link to send you a mesage
  • a list of up to 20 fan pages that you are a member of

For plenty of people, being displayed in the search engines is a great way to let people get in contact with you (or discover you).  I use it for just this reason to market my blog especially since Facebook tends to rank high in the search results but not everyone wants their information to be public (and I’m plenty careful about what is public on mine)

By visiting “Search Privacy Settings Page” (same as above); you can control the visiblility of your  teen’s public search listing which is visible to Google and other search engines.  You can turn off the public search listing by simply un-checking the box next to the phraes “Create a public search listing for me and submit it for search engine indexing”.  By the way, this option only shows up if you’ve selected “Everyone” under “Search Visibility”.

Avoid Embarrassing Photo/Video Tagging Mistakes

This is one of the most difficult (and common) problems that teens have with Facebook.  Sometimes it’s not even the poor judgment of the teen that gets them into trouble but the poor judgment of a “friend” who posts an ill-gotten, poorly timed photo or dis-tasteful video and then tags your unfortunate teenager.

How do you help your teen avoid this form of potential embarrassment?

  • Visit the page called, “profile privacy”  and modify the setting next to “Photos Tagged of You”
  • Select the option which says “Customize…” and a box while pop up
  • Select the option “Only Me” and then…
  • “None of my Networks”  if you would like to keep everything (all photos/videos) private.
  • If you’d like to make tagged photos visible to certain users, choose to add them in the box under “Some Friends”
  • In the box that displays after you select “Some Friends” you can type either individual friends or a friends list

Photos Privacy Page

Many times people will go to the effort of turning off their tagged photo visibility to certain friends but yet “forget” about their photo albums.  If you are trying to make all your photos invisible you have to do so with each album as well.

There is a specific “Photos Privacy Page” where you can manually configure the visibility of each album.  This setting is extremely useful and I highly recommend you take the time to show your teen how to use it and encourage them TO use it.   It may take some time initially to set up, but in the long run, only the people you truly want to view your photos, can see them.

Contact Information

Last by not least, make sure your teen has not listed your home phone number under contact info OR home address.  In fact, this is probably the one area that I think parents should have the MOST say in.  After all, your teen’s phone number, address, age, school etc are all pieces of information that are negotiable!

That’s my 2 cents.  Hopefully some of you will find this helpful.  I’ll continue to update and add information as parent/readers write in with other questions.

February 16, 2009 Posted by suescheff | Cyber Safety, Cyber Slander, Mom Blogs, Parent's Universal Resource Experts, Parenting Articles, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Teens, Sue Scheff, cyberbully, internet safety | , , , , , , | No Comments Yet

Sue Scheff – Teen Help – Residential Therapy – Learn More

If you are debating residential therapy for your teen, learn more about this extremely daunting and confusing industry. Yes, you need to get help – but educate yourself first.

Learn more about Wit’s End at http://www.witsendbook.com/ and author Sue Scheff at http://www.suescheff.com/ -the response has been overwhelming!

If you are struggling with your teen today – pick up Wit’s End and learn more!For a quick read, check out http://www.aparentstruestory.com/ – the foundation of  Wit’s End!

February 14, 2009 Posted by suescheff | At Risk Teens, Carolina Springs Academy, Parent's Universal Resource Experts, Parenting Articles, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Books, Parenting Teens, Sue Scheff, Teen Help Sales Rep, Troubled Teens, WWASPS, parent advocate, struggling teens, teen help, wit's end | , , , , , , , , | No Comments Yet

Sue Scheff: Prescription Drug Abuse and Teens on the Rise

pharmSince I speak with parents on almost a daily basis, I hear more and more of teens today selling, buying and/or taking prescription drugs. Parents need to be aware of this. Especially if you have a child on ADD/ADHD medication – keep count – be alert – be a proactive and educated parent. Or if you or anyone else in your home is on prescriptions meds, if you suspect you are refilling these prescriptions more often – stop, take count.

“I was a bum, I had slept outside, I mean all the stuff that you hear … and I always pictured a drug addict to be somebody that sleeps under a bridge … and it happened before I even knew it.”

– Andrew Theriot, 21 years old

Andrew Theriot first tried the prescription painkiller OxyContin when he was 17.  Within a month, he turned into someone nobody liked.  Andrew says, “My friends, nobody trusted me.  My family pretty much told me to get out after a long period of time … I would steal things.”

Experts say OxyContin gives an instant feeling of euphoria.  Sue Rusche, President of the anti-drug group National Families in Action, says, “I think we have to be honest about drugs.  I think we have to tell kids that the reason people use drugs is that drugs make you feel great … at first.  And you gotta have that ‘at first’ part.”

Next comes addiction.  Andrew spent every minute looking for drugs. He says, “I would wake up every day and I would just be miserable.  And the only thing I would look forward to that day would be getting high.”

Addiction brought misery, and so did withdrawal when Andrew was in rehab.  He says, “You get sick, you get the cold sweats, throwing up, stomach problems, you can’t eat.  I mean I was down to 125 pounds.”

Andrew is now in college.  He’s been drug free for two years, and has some advice to parents.   “I mean, don’t be enablers.  Don’t bail them out of jail.  Don’t pay their fines.  Don’t give them money.  You know, if they want money, get a job.  Don’t be the cause of them killing themselves.”

Tips for Parents

OxyContin is a controlled-release pain reliever that can drive away pain for up to 12 hours when used properly. When used improperly, however, OxyContin is a highly addictive opioid closely related to morphine. As individuals abuse the drug, the effects lessen over time, leading to higher dosage use.

Consider the following:

  • The supply of OxyContin is soaring. Sales of OxyContin, first marketed in 1996, hit $1.2 billion in 2003.
  • The FDA reports that OxyContin may have played a role in 464 deaths across the country in 2000 to 2001.
  • In 2000, 43 percent of those who ended up in hospital emergency rooms from drug overdoses – nearly 500,000 people – were there because of misusing or abusing prescription drugs.
  • In seven cities in 2000 (Atlanta, Chicago, Los Angeles, Miami, New York, Seattle, and Washington, D.C.) 626 people died from overdose of painkillers and tranquilizers. By 2001, such deaths had increased in Miami and Chicago by 20 percent.
  • From 1998 to 2000, the number of people entering an emergency room because of misusing or abusing oxycodone (OxyContin) rose 108 percent. The rates are intensifying … from mid-2000 to mid-2001, oxycodone went up in emergency room visits 44 percent.

OxyContin is typically abused in one of three ways …

  • By removing the outer coating and chewing the tablet.
  • By dissolving the tablet in water and injecting the fluid intravenously.
  • By crushing the tablet and snorting the powder.

Because the U.S. Food and Drug Administration puts its seal of approval on prescription drugs, many teens mistakenly believe that using these drugs – even if they are not prescribed to them – is safe. However, this practice can, in fact, lead to addiction and severe side effects. How can you determine if your teen is abusing drugs? The American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry suggests looking for the following warning signs and symptoms in your teen:

  • Physical: Fatigue, repeated health complaints, red and glazed eyes and a lasting cough
  • Emotional: Personality change, sudden mood changes, irritability, irresponsible behavior, low self-esteem, poor judgment, depression and a general lack of interest
  • Familial: Starting arguments, breaking rules or withdrawing from the family
  • School-related: Decreased interest, negative attitude, drop in grades, many absences, truancy and discipline problems
  • Social: having new friends who are less interested in standard home and school activities, problems with the law, and changes to less conventional styles in dress and music

If you believe your teen has a problem with drug abuse, you can take several steps to get the help he or she needs. The American Academy of Family Physicians suggests contacting your health-care provider so that he or she can perform an adequate medical evaluation in order to match the right treatment or intervention program with your teen. You can also contact a support group in your community dedicated to helping families coping with addiction.

Substance abuse can be an overwhelming issue with which to deal, but it doesn’t have to be. The Partnership for a Drug-Free America offers the following strategies to put into practice so that your teen can reap the rewards of a healthy, drug-free life:

  • Be your teen’s greatest fan. Compliment him or her on all of his or her efforts, strength of character and individuality.
  • Encourage your teen to get involved in adult-supervised after-school activities. Ask him or her what types of activities he or she is interested in and contact the school principal or guidance counselor to find out what activities are available. Sometimes it takes a bit of experimenting to find out which activities your teen is best suited for, but it’s worth the effort – feeling competent makes children much less likely to use drugs.
  • Help your teen develop tools he can use to get out of drug-related situations. Let him or her know he or she can use you as an excuse: “My mom would kill me if I smoked marijuana!”
  • Get to know your teen’s friends and their parents. Set appointments for yourself to call them and check-in to make sure they share your views on alcohol, tobacco and other drugs. Steer your teen away from any friends who use drugs.
  • Call teens’ parents if their home is to be used for a party. Make sure that the party will be drug-free and supervised by adults.
  • Set curfews and enforce them. Let your teen know the consequences of breaking curfew.
  • Set a no-use rule for alcohol, tobacco and other drugs.
  • Sit down for dinner with your teen at least once a week. Use the time to talk – don’t eat in front of the television.
  • Get – and stay – involved in your teen’s life.

References

  • American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry
  • American Academy of Family Physicians
  • Partnership for a Drug-Free America
  • National Institute on Drug Abuse
  • U.S. Food & Drug Administration

February 12, 2009 Posted by suescheff | At Risk Teens, Connect with Kids, Parent's Universal Resource Experts, Parenting Articles, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Teens, Problem Teens, Sue Scheff, Teen Depression, Teen Drug Use, out of control teens, parent advocate, peer pressure, struggling teens, teen drug addiction, teen help | , , , , , , , , , | No Comments Yet

Sue Scheff: Teen Help Programs – Helping Create Safe Environments

washdcMany are aware of the pending legislation in regards to help regulate schools and programs for at risk teens.  This bill may not be perfect, but it is a start and has finally opened discussions.  As a parent that was a victim of the teen help industry – and my daughter endured abuse both physically and emotionally, I understand the need for not only good programs, but oversight so what happened to my daughter doesn’t continue to happen to others.  Which is why I created Parents’ United Resource Experts  in 2001.  We help educate parents that are desperate and at their wit’s end.  They are ready to make rash decisions, as I did – trusting people while I was in desperate state of mind.  Afterall, as a parent, we want to help our kids – it is natural. 

Most importantly, this is not to say all programs are bad – quite the contrary, most are good, however it is about educating parents about finding the best fit for your individual child.  Questions to Ask Schools and Programs, Helpful Hints, and my new book – Wit’s End! Advice and Resources for Saving Your Out of Control Teens has a complete step by step section to help you – help your teen.

Mike Kruger – Online Outreach Specialist – Committee for Education and Labor

Teen Residential Programs are currently virtually unregulated and the House Education and Labor Committee is going to pass minimum standards for these programs to protect the safety of children. The link to the Markup is here – http://edlabor.house.gov/markups/2009/02/stop-child-abuse-in-residentia-1.shtml – and will include more information after the Committee votes.

Advisory: House Education Committee to Vote on Legislation to Stop Child Abuse in Teen Residential Programs
 
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The House Education and Labor Committee will consider legislation to protect teenagers attending residential programs from physical, mental and sexual abuse and help ensure that parents have the information they need to make safer choices for their kids.
 
An investigation conducted by the U.S. Government Accountability Office at the committee’s request found thousands of cases and allegations of child abuse and neglect at residential programs for teens, including therapeutic boarding schools, boot camps, wilderness camps, and behavior modification facilities. In some cases, this abuse led to the death of a child.
 
WHAT:          Mark-up of H.R. 911, “Stop Child Abuse in Residential Programs for Teens Act of 2009”
 
WHO:            The House Education and Labor Committee
 
WHEN:          Wednesday, February 11, 2009
10:15 a.m. EST
 
WHERE:       House Education and Labor Committee Hearing Room
2175 Rayburn House Office Building
Washington, D.C.

February 10, 2009 Posted by suescheff | At Risk Teens, Parent's Universal Resource Experts, Parenting Articles, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Books, Parenting Teens, Problem Teens, Sue Scheff, Troubled Teens, out of control teens, parent advocate, struggling teens, teen help, wit's end | , , , , , , , , , , | No Comments Yet

Sue Scheff – Teen Intervention – New Series

Are you struggling with debating whether you need to look for outside help with your troubled teenager?

Are you ready to make some very difficult decisions?  Are you at your wit’s end?

Do you believe you need teen intervention from outside resources? Struggling financially and emotionally with this decision?

Are you willing to share your story on TV?  This is not about exploiting your family, but helping others that are silently suffering and not realizing they are not alone as well as giving your teen a second opportunity at a bright future.  Most remember Brat Camp – this is a bit different.  Starting with educating parents about the first steps in getting your teen help - determination and transportation.

If you are interested in participating, read below and contact Bud and Evan directly. 

uislogo3

Brentwood Communications International is an award-winning television production company in Los Angeles, California.  We have recently begun work on a new television series about the real life work of interventionist / transporter Evan James Malmuth of Universal Intervention Services (“UIS”).

 

If you would be willing to allow us to film your case / intervention for the television series, Evan Malmuth and Universal Intervention Services will provide intervention / transportation services at no charge to you.  In addition, we will negotiate at least one month of treatment services at a qualified treatment center at no charge with the purchase of at least two additional months of treatment at pre-negotiated discount rates.  At the current rate of these services, this represents thousands of dollars in savings.

 

BCII and Evan Malmuth are not interested in making exploitative reality television.  We are committed to helping you and your family and improving lives through the media. 

 

If you are interested in participating in the show and using the services of Evan Malmuth and UIS, please contact us right away.  Every day counts.

 

Email:  tvhelp@bciitv.com

Phone: 818-333-3685

 

 

With best regards,

 

Bud Brutsman                                                            Evan James Malmuth

CEO                                                                              CEO

Brentwood Communications Intl., Inc.                       Universal Intervention Services

February 7, 2009 Posted by suescheff | At Risk Teens, Parent's Universal Resource Experts, Parenting Articles, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Teens, Problem Teens, Sue Scheff, Teen Depression, Teen Drug Use, Teen Eating Disorders, Teen Intervention, Teen Runaways, Teen drinking, Teens Stealing, difficult teens, out of control teens, parent advocate, peer pressure, struggling teens, teen drug addiction, teen help, teen peer pressure, teen suicide, tough love | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | No Comments Yet

Sue Scheff: Reputation Defender and Michael Fertik Featured on The Early Show

repdefJan. 10, 2009

(CBS) Did you ever “google” yourself and find something negative?

It should worry you. Just one negative posting can cost you a job

It’s estimated that more than 70 percent of employers do a Web search on job applicants as part of their hiring procedures. More than half of them admit to not bringing someone on board because of negative information they found online.

It could be something you posted years ago, or something put into cyberspace by someone you know – or even a perfect stranger.

What can you do about it?

Michael Fertik, founder of ReputationDefender.com, had some advice on The Early Show Saturday Edition.

Fertik says he started the business two years ago with one person. He now has 60 employees. His service costs about $10 a month.

Fertik told substitute co-anchor Seth Doane that safeguarding your online reputation is “as important as your credit score nowadays. Every life transaction that you have, whether you’re looking for a job, you’re looking for romance, you’re looking for a friend – people are gonna look you up on the Web and make conclusions based on what they find.

“One random, idiosyncratic piece of content about you on the Web could dominate your Google results forever,” he said. “It’s such an issue: It affects people who are undeserving, people who are sort of using bad judgment, all kinds of different people.”

What’s worse, legal recourse is murky at best, Fertik observed, saying, “The law hasn’t caught up yet with privacy. The Internet has really changed the privacy landscape in a big way and the law hasn’t yet caught up with it. It’s lagging behind, so far.”

Fertik stressed that, “You have to be on top of your (online) reputation. It’s not about narcissism. It’s about your personal brand. Especially in a down economy, people are looking you up, they’re making decisions. They’re denying you a job unless they find something really good about you on the Web.”

He had three key pieces of advice:

First, never let anyone set up your reputation online. Establish yourself online to create a clear and positive image of you. Don’t wait for someone else to destroy it. Use what he calls “Google insurance”: Create a profile on something like Facebook that’s positive and tasteful. Claim the real estate on your name. What is said about you on the Web isn’t a function of you living a righteous life: Anyone can say something bad about you. “Write your own history,” he recommended.

Second, if there’s a problem with your online reputation, you have to find it. Constantly monitor the Web. Search for full names, usernames, etc. Be on top of the game. Go deep into the Internet to Web sites that aren’t indexed by Google: “The deep Web – Facebook, MySpace, the pages where the content really starts to generate and become problematic.”

“Monitor yourself assiduously,” Fertik told Doane.

Third: The longer it’s there, the more it spreads and can be archived. If you see a problem, deal with it quickly. Get in touch with people and tell them to stop, in a kind and thoughtful way, without getting a lawyer involved right away. Reach them on a human level. If you want professional help, companies such as ReputationDefender are available. As Fertik told Doane, “Nip it in the bud before it spreads and gets mirrored and replicated. If you can’t do it, you want to hire the pros.”

If you do find something bad about yourself, how do you get it offline?
“Sometimes,” Fertik responded to Doane, “what we do is, we overwhelm the ‘bad’ with good to make sure that when people look you up, they see what you want them to see, they see your good videos, not necessarily the (bad ones).”

February 6, 2009 Posted by suescheff | Cyber Safety, Cyber Slander, Internet Abuse, Internet Defamation, Internet Slander, Michael Fertik, Online Safety, Reputation Defender, Sue Scheff, cyberbully, cyberbullying | , , , , , , , , , , | No Comments Yet

Sue Scheff: Middle School Parenting – Survival Kit

middleschoolkitFeaturing real kids talking about real issues, this Emmy award-winning Connect With Kids series helps inspire communication between parents and their children about the challenges, pressures and influences every pre-teen faces. Making it easier to talk to your Middle-Schooler about today’s tough issues, this Middle School Survival Kit contains programs covering these timely topics: Internet Dangers, Drugs & Alcohol, Dating & Sex, Anxiety & Depression.

Selected video segments from our most popular titles are combined to create a must-have for every parent …

  • Sticks and Stones and Invisible Weapons cover the problems of bullying, gossiping and emotional harassment.
  • Gateway Drugs shows actual kids sharing their personal experiences about drugs, smoking and peer pressure.
  • In Caught in the Web, real-life stories teach lessons about internet safety and cyberbullying.
  • Anxiety and depression are discussed in Leave Me Alone, helping parents and kids distinguish between moodiness and signs of more serious emotional issues.
  • Innocence Lost and First Comes Love approach the topics of sex and dating, some of the most difficult subjects for parents and kids to discuss together.

The Middle School Survival Kit also features “Ask the Experts” bonus segments providing additional information on all the topics discussed.

If you have a child in middle school, purchase this Middle School Survival Kit and watch it together. Learn expert advice about how you and your family can navigate the pre-teen years.

February 4, 2009 Posted by suescheff | Parent's Universal Resource Experts, Parenting Articles, Parenting Blogs, Parenting Podcasts, Parenting Teens, Sue Scheff, parent advocate | , , , , , , | No Comments Yet